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End-timers gleefully anticipate a bloody war led by Trump and Jesus | We are Athiest
Wed. Feb 28th, 2024


DONALD Trump, according to his certifiably insane ‘spiritual advisor‘ Paul White, above, will shortly be in the vanguard of a battle that will lead to ‘The Rapture.’

She knows this because Him Upstairs recently told her so.

God came to me last night and showed me a vision of Trump riding alongside Jesus on a horse made of gold and jewels. This means he will play a critical role in Armageddon as the United States stands alongside Israel in the battle against Islam.

Has Trump any military experience? Nope. He was a draft dodger.

Has he ever ever been on a horse? A trawl through Google Images only yielded this doctored photo:

Image via Twitter

What is genuine is an organisation called Cowboys for Trump. It membership, one can safely assume, is made up of people who are far less intelligent than their horses.

Anyway, around the same time God spoke to White, US televangelist Jack Van Impe declared a in televised sermon on January 10:

It’s going to be the bloodiest war in the world. The blood will flow to the bridles of the horses for 200 miles.

Image via YouTube

Eight days later, Van Impe, 89, upped and joined the Choir Invisible, prompting a statement on his ministry’s that said:

The beloved Dr. Jack Van Impe was welcomed into Heaven by His blessed Savior and Lord who he had so faithfully served in ministry for over 70 years.

Please pray for his beloved wife and lifelong ministry partner Rexella and their families as they grieve this immense loss and for wisdom as she and the Board lead the ministry in the days ahead.

Further details about Dr. Van Impe’s homecoming celebration will be published later.

There’s a great deal about this lunatic on Christianity Today, but the only interesting thing that jumped out at me was that his paranoia proved too much for the Trinity Broadcasting Network (TBN) which had regularly broadcast his cockamamie rants until 2011:

He started attacking other Christian ministers for not taking a strong enough stand against Islam … Van Impe said megachurch pastors Rick Warren and Robert Schuller, both of whom had spoken to Muslim groups, were secretly promoting a merger of Christianity and Islam, or Chrislam.

TBN refused to air the episode and Van Impe separated from the network. The Van Impes continued the show on their own, broadcasting Jack Van Impe Presents on TV and the internet. On January 10, the most recent episode available on the ministry website, Rexella Van Impe read headlines about the heightening conflict between the US and Iran.

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